For Eden

I remember my first crush
he was 5 foot 4 with feet fitted in black reeboks
with the pump
he had a braid that hung between his shoulder blades
that seemed to sprout from the back of his neck
because the rest of his hair was short
We'd walk home from the bus stop together
and the paved path proved to be laced with angel's wings
because those 7 1/2 minutes before we got to his house
would make my shaky palms sweat
and my stomach twitch to almost the same sensation that sent kids home from school sick
He was the kind of kid who would save you that seat on the busride
in the morning
the one in the back where bumps would bounce you airborn
and he had my heart
wrapped in teenage mutant ninja turtles
we couldnt afford action figures
so we made the action ourselves
He taught me profoundly like how girls have a vagina
and boys have muscles
but he also got my mouth washed out with Ivory soap
for teaching me profanity
who knew "fuck" was a word only for adults?
He would beat box and do the robot
he has a skateboard when it was hip-hop
we used to trade garbage pale kids collector cards
and climb across the top of the monkey bars
just to prove we were above everyone else
it was that kind of love that would wait up for me when riding out huffies
round town with the queen of hearts in the spokes to make that fitfitfit sound
I would save him the last bit of my lime green freeze pop
because it his favorite part was the juice at the bottom
It was mine too, but love is selfless
It was that kind of love before you've been hurt
so you know your feelings are real
and you give without expectation
and you live without reservation
you didn't need to hold back
because you had no idea what pain felt like
at 9 years old I loved better than I do now
because there was nothing to compare it to
except riding our backs down a hill so fast with no hands or feet
hearing the whistle of the wind rush over our ears
stretching our arms out and getting a green ligh at the bottom
so we could just keep going